Has motherhood changed me?

Before I fell pregnant I was, I would say, a fairly average teenage girl. I was unsure in myself and in what I wanted to do with my life, I struggled with my body image and confidence and was just starting the path to really learning about myself.

I had a place at University to study Medical Biochemistry. A subject I had chosen (after lots of discussions with different people) due to being convinced that it would be a waste of my intelligence to study anything that wasn’t highly academic with professional, well paid job prospects.

I placed a lot of emphasis on valuing myself based on other peoples standards, I would put what other people thought of me above what I thought of myself.

I was allowing difficult relationships to take up space in my life, which consequently were affecting my mental health. This was also something that heavily affected me during pregnancy.

And then I gave birth to my son.

I’ve heard the phrase ‘with Birth, the woman is born too’ a few times, and I very much believe that holds a lot of truth. Becoming a mother has changed me in so many ways.

I have completely disregarded anyone else’s opinion on what route I should take my life down and as a result am now holding a place to study Sport and Exercise Science. My true passion. Becoming a mother has given me unrecognisable confidence in myself to do what I want to do, this is my life and my life only.

I now only place value in my own opinion of myself. Being a young mother you have to face a lot of negativity; people thinking you are less capable than someone older or people thinking you’ve somehow messed up your life. I am incredibly proud of myself, of what I have done and what I am doing. Me, and my family, have an amazing life ahead of us.

Arlo clearly wasn’t happy about this…

Becoming a mother has given me clarity in what I want to do and who I want to be. It has given me the space to flourish as a woman and grow confidence I never thought I could have. I have gained unconditional love and respect for my body, something I had been working very hard on for the last few years.

A lot of people want to tell you all the negative sides to becoming a parent, about how you’ll loose your own identity and it will test your relationship. Something that is emphasised when you’re younger, as you can add ruining your career prospects etc into the mix. But personally, I have found non of those things to be true. Mindset makes a lot of difference to your experiences in my opinion.

Alfresco dining

Arlo has taught me so much, bringing so much love and happiness with him. He has brought me and Kieran so much closer and not only helped us grow in ourselves but as a couple. Seeing Kieran be a better Dad than I could ever have asked for will always make me happy.

Georgia X

Education + careers as young parents.

Me and Kieran met in the summer of 2017. By complete coincidence and perfect timing. I was living in Brighton at the time, and just so happened to have come back to Whitstable for the weekend as I was visiting Surrey uni the next day. Within a few weeks of knowing each other, I had made the decision to move back to Whitstable.

As a result I had to change schools, and do the equivalent of completing my A-levels in one year. This was the boldest move I had ever made in my life, and despite almost everyone doubting me, it was the best choice I have made to date.

I worked incredibly hard to catch up with my A-levels, driven to succeed at any cost. All while training the hardest I had ever trained in preparation for competing in Powerlifting. It may sound strange, but I was the happiest I had ever been. Moving back, meeting Kieran, rekindling my love of studying and prepping for competing regionally all contributed to me truly feeling happy with who I was and what I was doing in life.

I had my place at University, I was predicted to achieve high grades and had a bright career in front of me.

Then two weeks before sitting all the exams I had worked so incredibly hard for, I found out I was pregnant. In that moment, everything felt like it had come crashing down. Me and Kieran knew we wanted children in the not so distant future, but just not now.

Although we hadn’t decided what to do, I was determined to still achieve what I wanted from my exams. I was sick (very sick) almost every morning, I was hiding everything from everyone I knew, I was attending appointments at abortion clinics AND I was sitting the most important exams I had ever sat.

But in all adversity, I did it. I got the grades I had worked so hard for and for that I will forever be proud.

On the 12.07.18, outside the doors of Kings College Hospital London, me and Kieran chose to meet our boy. And I am eternally grateful we made that choice.

Walking around London 12.07.18

Now I sit here, holding a place at University for September 2019 AND holding our baby. Kieran travels to London everyday to study Osteopathy, and in September we will both be enrolled at the same university, living in our own house, building the brightest futures.

Having a child and studying is hard, don’t get me wrong. But so is having a child and working a full time job. Instead of bringing a child into our lives, we our building our lives with our child. Kieran is studying to become an Osteopath with his own practice, I will be studying to become an elite strength coach, and we’re both working towards our dream of opening a gym. Balancing looking after our boy and studying is all about organisation, and is by no means impossible.

Arlo gets to see us work hard, achieve our ambitions and grow as people – to me that is priceless.

Georgia X